Summary: You (the listener) are scant minutes away from getting married, when I (the speaker) sneak into the room where you're getting ready. I've been holding a secret over your head for a long time and fucking you behind your fiance's back, but I promised it would end when you got married. You aren't married yet though, and I have a little wedding gift to give you before the ceremony. And you will accept it. Even if I have to give it to you by force.